The year is 2000. The world heaves a collective sigh of relief after the catastrophic effects of the Y2K bug plane crash failed to materialize. Launch of PlayStation 2, captivating gamers around the world. And I go back to school with levels of loot I can never reach again, thanks to the cell phone in my pocket. It's a Nokia 8210, also known as the awesome Charlie's Angel miniature phone. While it was originally a bright red color, I replaced the front and back covers with a textured basketball cover that looked like the real thing. If anyone cares to look at the screen, they'll notice that the "Orange" network logo has been replaced with a "No Fear" Xtreme logo. On the very rare occasion that my phone would ring, a seedy monophonic rendition of Destiny's Child's Jumpin' Jumpin' would blast through the speakers. It scares me to think of how much money I spent on this tacky parade. If you are reading this and connecting with me on a spiritual level, then this article will be a fuzzy, warm and safe space filled with the golden rays of soulful longing. However, if you're from a newer generation and accidentally stumbled across this page while filming a new TikTok video or looking for a way to earn more V-Bucks, then the next section has you covered. You will be met with a mixture of confusion, disbelief, and compassion for the generations that came before you. Either way, we hope you enjoy taking a look at how things were before the time. No touch screens, no color, and exclusive accessories as far as the eye can see. Welcome to the world before smartphones.
Predictive text T9
Long before the arrival of the full QWERTY keyboard on screen, we had to make do with message spoofing using basic number keys. Each key had three letters, and the last four members of the alphabet lived on the "9" key. If you want to type the letter "B," for example, you'll have to press the number 2 twice (the abc key) to change to "B." Although it sounds like a tedious and complicated hassle, most people trust the speed and accuracy of it, thanks to the magical powers of the Predictive Dictionary, which allows you to go through the most likely words based on what you have typed so far. . If you were particularly good, you could even text people without even looking at your phone, for more bragging rights. 8-)
Instant face lift covers
With modern smartphones mostly looking like boring rectangular tiles, the only way to really stand out from the crowd is to cover your phone in a case. In the old days, the phones themselves had removable covers, allowing you to instantly and drastically change the look without worrying about sticky skins or bulky covers. The cheesy, erotic '90s ad pictured above proves the point much better than our words ever could.
Replaceable batteries
Another benefit of having removable covers is the fact that you can easily swap out your battery for an instant 100% charge. Combined with the fact that the phones can last a week with heavy use without breaking a sweat, you can theoretically go on the road for a month with a few spare batteries and no charger in sight. Try making it today at a festival weekend and you'll be firmly in the merciless hands of Drum Anxiety long before you run out of cider.
Any owner
It's easy to look back on rose-tinted bezels, but some things in the pre-smartphone world were pretty boring. Let's take chargers, for example. The idea that you could share the same charging cable between phones from different manufacturers was not even a distant pipe dream, it seemed utterly impossible. Nokia, Samsung, Sony Ericsson, and others all had proprietary charging cables for their phones, so if you were at a friend's house and needed to refuel, you'd be out of luck if they didn't have the same phone. As phones developed the ability to let you listen to music, they also had their own specific headphones that would use all sorts of weird connections instead of the regular 3,5mm audio jack we know (and are missing) today. Today's world of USB-C and Lightning ports is a dream by comparison.
ASCII emoticons
If the end of the paragraph above seems like a random typo, then you're too young to remember ASCII emoticons, the forerunner of modern emoji. With no fancy graphics available, humans conveyed their emotions through text using 100% organic characters and symbols. From classic smileys and winks :-) ;-) to expressions of disappointment -
- and even cute little animals <(^^)>, the world of emoticons has fueled creativity, encouraging people to find increasingly complex ways to express themselves.
Pay (and create your own) ringtones
Paying for ringtones seems like a completely foreign concept nowadays, but back then we happily parted with money for hideously rendered versions of monophonic songs. When polyphonic ringtones (adding multiple sound channels) came out our collective minds were blown. On some models, you can even create your own ringtones by pressing cryptic buttons, as shown in the video above for a 2020 meme song.
Replacing your network with random images
Long before the idea of custom wallpapers caught on, you could pay to have your network logo replaced with a different image. Replacing the boring "Orange" text with the Nike logo was considered the latest in fashion, and there's nothing you can say today that would change our minds.
Cases
Back in the days when phones didn't stray too far from the size and weight of bricks around the house (think credit card-sized SIM cards), people were forced to carry them in belt pouches. Horribly ugly, like the six coolest shooters in the world. Fortunately, when things started to wind down in the Nokia 3210 era, the only people still using ugly cases were business people, who wanted a quick overview of all the important business calls they were making and taking.
Snake
Originally debuting on the Nokia 6110, this simple pixelated waste of time has engrossed people with the most addictive gameplay in gaming history. Controlling a snake so it could devour a tasty square with basic up, down, left and right controls, they spent countless hours staring at screens and fending off thumb cramps. You can keep your modern fantasy Call of Zombies: #2Flossing4Furious 3D games, thank you very much. We prefer the amazing simplicity that this legendary title brings to the table.
Invincible Headphones
If you drop a phone today, you've already calculated the high repair costs before the glass breaks on the track. The phones of yesteryear, however, laugh on concrete. Those 3310 indestructible memes you've seen floating around aren't works of fiction: the old ones combined with their all-plastic construction and tiny screens were virtually indestructible, as long as they were kept from falling into water. Even then, you can try the rice bag trick as a last resort, which would often bring your beloved phone back from the brink of death.