Finding the elusive queer parent in the game

• The comparison
• Video Games
• Finding the elusive queer parent in the game

LGBTQ + Game Week 2021

(Image credit: TechRadar / R Healey Art) Welcome to TechRadar LGBTQ+ Gaming Week 2021. During this week-long celebration, we spotlight issues and voices within the LGBTQ+ gaming community. Learn more here. Last year my husband and eldest son flew to England for a long weekend with my husband's parents. We were waiting for the judge to approve the adoption of our second child, and naturally I couldn't get a passport until that happened, so I stayed home in the United States with him. I couldn't wait to eat garlic without worrying about someone smelling my breath, watching all the horror movies my husband was too much of a coward to watch...and of course staying up all night playing video games. As a new parent, my accumulation of "to play" games had become embarrassing. But my son wasn't sleeping well and he needed to find a game that required minimal dexterity, so I went to the Nintendo eShop to take a look. And that's where I found Dream Daddy.

Dream dads

Dream Daddy (Image credit: Game Grumps) I was originally interested in Dream Daddy because it was cheap, and the game's art featured seven sexy men looking at me longingly. But once I started playing, I was paralyzed. While I've never been much of a dating sim player, preferring to shoot zombies or obsessively upgrade my Materia, I was immediately drawn to Dream Daddy because it's secretly revolutionary. “Gaming has always been my escape, providing fantastic worlds that I could jump into, where I could build a new narrative for myself. But once my kids were born, I didn't find myself in my fantasy worlds either. I realized that in over 30 years of playing, through all my adventures in the Mushroom Kingdom, Liberty City and Silent Hill and beyond, I had never met a gay father. So Dream Daddy wanted to say something. And it made me think. When we adopted my children, my husband and I had to fill out a lot of paperwork: adoption forms, hospitalization forms, legal forms, passport applications, and possibly daycare information. On many of these forms, you must cross out "Mother" and write "Father 2" in its place. It wasn't that painful, but after a while it got a bit irritating having to constantly remind others of my existence; or even worse, having to prove my right to be in a place where many didn't think I belonged. Video games have always been my escape, offering fantastic worlds that I could jump into, where I could build a new narrative for myself. But once my kids were born, I didn't find myself in my fantasy worlds either. Fatherhood abounds in the game's narratives: a hero is always on the hunt for his secret bloodline or out looking for a missing relative, but that fatherhood is almost always direct. And even in places where it exists, usually in sims like The Sims, queerness can feel like a snap rather than a genuinely weird story.

Stoic guardians

The Witcher 3 (Image credit: CD Projekt Red) I remember playing The Witcher 3 and wanting my Geralt to be gay. There was no reason why he couldn't have been; the continent was teeming with eligible bachelors. But I had to romanticize Triss and Yennefer. It would have been great, so meaningful, to be a great gay witch fighting monsters with my adoptive daughter Ciri. Queer gamers are often drawn to side stories and queer supporting characters, but the time has passed for fully formed queer stories. And when it comes to queer parents, the foundation is already there. The ever-fond Impa stands in for Zelda in various entries in the series and, not to lean too much into cliché, her prowess as a warrior and her fierce independence give her a wonderfully haunting vibe. . And while we're talking about Zelda, who can forget Link's uncle, who kept such a fabulously decorated cabin and died talking about swords? Joining Aloy's dashing adoptive father Rost from Horizon Zero Dawn, Tidus' manicured mentor Auron from Final Fantasy X, and many more, these stoic guardians have been vehicles for what queer parenting has become. infiltrator in the conventional games; or at least, characters like these have allowed gay players who are parents (or hope to be one day) to see parts of themselves in the story.

The chosen family

Final Fantasy XV (Image Credit: Square Enix) One of the unique joys of RPGs is the Chosen Family aspect that many of them bring. So many queer people have had to choose their families. While it's sometimes a choice that stems from extreme pain and trauma, it's also one of the most enjoyable things about the queer community. My children have families with official titles like grandmother and grandfather, but they also have fairy godmothers, uncles and aunts whose bond is deep and not blood. "My children have families with official titles like grandmother and grandfather, but they also have fairy godmothers, uncles and aunts whose bond is deep and not blood." Until I reflected on Dream Daddy, Geralt, Impa, and Rost, I didn't realize that my role model for a chosen family had been with me since I first performed The Secret of Mana in elementary school. In this game, my three misfit characters from very different backgrounds became a family by the end of the game. They turned their backs, loved each other despite their unique traumas, and then came together to save the game. world. My nights in Chrono Trigger and Chrono Cross, in Final Fantasy V to XV, in Skies of Arcadia, in Persona V and in Child of Light were all queer families, because I put them together. As an older millennial mine is one of the first generations to have played with us throughout their lives as previous generations had movies and books. We don't talk enough about how gaming shapes our lives as parents, but I know for a fact that gaming has shaped mine because gaming has shaped every part of me. It's time for queer stories of all kinds to be told in games. I want to see myself and see people like me do all the wonderful things I've seen straight characters do over the years. But more importantly, I want my kids to be able to play and see a family like kick it. < p class="vanilla-image-block" style="padding-top:100.02%;"> Like Sharon Stone and Zipper, Mike McClelland hails from Meadville, Pennsylvania. She has lived on five different continents, but now resides in the southern United States with her husband, two children, and a collection of rescue dogs. He is the author of the short fiction collection Gay Zoo Day and recently completed a novel about queer superheroes. Follow him on magicmikewrites.com.